Monday, November 06, 2006

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ARTIST OUT OF CONTROL


That's me in the gray hair. I'm a mess. I've got a cold--the first in about two years--and I am lupey again, or still. I can't get started in my day. I haven't taken my blood, had a bath or shower, and of course I'm still in my (moose with a bell) pajamas. (These PJ's make me smile inside.) My weight is still the highest it's ever been in my entire life and I feel helpless about it. I'm out of control with my eating and I feel hopeless. It's hard to go out in the evenings and I especially don't want to now but going to Overeaters Anonymous is the only thing I can do to address my eating. I just have to go. Feeling lousy makes going very hard.
Last night instead of going to bed early, I started the winking cat drawing for the authors I've been working with. It's okay. I think I needed to do something successful. He looks fierce. I like the other drawings too and I'd like to put them on-line when I remember.
My children and my cousin visited yesterday and they brought my gigantic cousins painting inside. It wouldn't fit on the family room wall so it's going on the upstairs living room wall behind the sofa where it lived in the other house. It takes up the entire wall from the top of the sofa. I got cold feet about hanging it though on the newly restored wall, so I'm going to ask the guys how to hang it or if they'll hang it.
I still haven't taken my blood, bathed, or eaten and it's getting late. I'm daydreaming of food now so maybe I'll venture downstairs in my pajamas and eat something.

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