When Life Throws Bricks

 I met, either my angel, or one of them, last night.  I am so thankful.  I did one of the meditations online that was supposed to have the listener meet her guardian angel, or something like that....and I did.  I'll have to draw him/her because a description wouldn't do it.  She/he had wings though.  Maybe she was a fairy, a loving, supportive one.  I am totally amazed by these positive, loving energies around me, and my pop-up issues from literally, seventy years ago.  I assume no one will see this and that's fine.  I can't say all the energy floating around on here is positive.  I wish I could.  We're human and flawed.

Interviewed Janis Joplin just now. One of my special favorites, yes, from yore. Felt wonderful! Did David Crosby a few days ago. Up uP uP tALKING TO SPIRITS HAS ITS DIVIDENDS.

I'm back. Husband of 60 years has kidney failure, stage 4. My fifteen and 1/2 year old German Shepherd mix has cancer. There is more cancer around me than I ever thought possible. He's alive now and so is the dog. Also the 17 year old cat in my lap.

I belong to a psychic group. At first, I was very excited, then the group grew to about 500, mostly women. Unlike me, they're almost all guarded and say nothing. If the host talks, then they answer. Someone actually recommended another "Medium" instead of me or someone else. The one she recommended is a snotty creep. Uptight, waspy, jealous. I couldn't get a reading from any of them, yet I was happy to read anyone for free. I'm too open and honest. People like those, even if they're psychic, are conformist. I have only the one thing in common and it's nothing. Sadly, everything ends like this. I always seem to find a group or a person I like, only to find down the road, that they're shit. Not for me. I'm so disappointed, hurt, and angry. I am such a good compassionate person, a loving person, and they don't have any idea where I'm coming from. My story. I haven't been appreciated. I'm tremendously angry, but anger is not what I want. It's really hurt. Those women are afraid. They've never been in long-term therapy. Shadow selves? They just don't know. They look at the academic stuff around finding oneself. That's not how to find it. I found it. I appreciate myself. It wouldn't matter if they did, although I'd feel better. I am a whole person and they aren't. I'm not perfect and fI still have issues, but I am. I really am. Jerry said, "All you have to do is be". I do, Jer. I am. It's a surprise to see how much more I understand about being a human. I learned it while trying to get calm (which I'm not yet). I need to learn to shut up when I'm with toxic folks. It's still a problem. And coping with being left out. Even from stuff I wouldn't want to be in. Oh, issues. We all have them and we take them into death (of our meat bodies).

I really do not want to be angry at those women. They're doing their best. I was given an incredible gift of psychotherapy for 50 years.
I interview spirits and talk about how to keep enjoying life when life throws bricks at you.

I Can Do Remote Viewing! Yay!

 I'm very excited.  Today, I realized I can remotely channel living people.  That means I can channel politicians and also the USA or other countries, as beings.  I channel spirits now, and hear the answers they send.  I don't know if this ability will mean more people will watch my podcasts, but this particular skill was very similar to the analysis I used to do at the psych hospital as a Therapeutic Recreation Director.  I enjoyed figuring out what patients were achieving and all that.  It was somewhat like going into their heads.  That is what my "new" skill is.  

  I won't be going into awful folk's feelings or thoughts.  I can't just stand there and do that.  I would think the inside of their heads should be private.  

  I worried that I couldn't compete, even though I'm not trying to earn a living or be an expert.  I'm 76.  I want to help grieving people, using the love and compassion I feel.  It makes me feel useful and proud.  I can see my wisdom and it feels great to be of service.

  Last night, I called Moses because I was getting ribbed, being a Jew, and having Jesus as a friend.  So, Moses came.  He told me, yes, he really was raised by Egyptians.  He was a powerful person.  I could feel it.  Moses recommended Aaron, instead of him.  My Sephardic family are Levites, and Aaron was the priest, (or whatever).  Founder?  Moses said Aaron is a people person and my relative.  Aaron came and at first, didn't understand what I wanted.  It's a 3000 years separation, but he pretty quickly decided it was fined.  He was/is, my grandfather too.  My dad's father is a little scared of me.  He doesn't feel smart enough, and my mother's father, while extremely smart, is more academic.  Aaron fits, I think.  He's warm and caring.  We'll see.  I might be 76 going on 4.  (God forbid!)

  I am awed.  So thankful.  I hadn't thought of this, or asked for it.  On the other hand, it still hurts badly to walk.  Usually, my left leg screams with every step.  It's my back, pain shooting down the nerve.  I also have IBS (or whatever it really is that came on eleven years ago).  Who leaves the house when they diarrhea threatens.  That, I'm overwhelmed by.  Planning on going somewhere, all dressed, and I can't leave.  Can I chance it?  That's how I broke my shoulder in Chicago.  I may not be able to travel unless it's an emergency.  It will be iffy.  I'm so thankful I traveled with my brother through a good bit of Europe and have spend a lot of time in the West and Northwest.  

  We're all coming to an end.  It's the last part of our lives.  The little bit of family left, from the Levy's, Price's, and Warshaw's are all heading toward the exit.  So few children, but they're gems.  Children are always gems.  We want ours to be brilliant and talented.  Money is not the goal.  It's brains.

  We are an unwelcome tribe, a Middle-Eastern anomaly, always hounded, with hate and pitchforks.  And we fight barbaric religious terrorists who would see children starve rather than compromise.  Peace is hard to come by with religious zealots of any breed.  Okay.  We change religions, ethnicities, bodies, and more with every life.  Once Vietnamese, next time, English Gentry.  Life.  And there is so much more to see and learn.  I may not be able to travel, but I can talk with spirits and think.  This ability feels glorious.

  I do love what has happened to me.  I've gone through a metamorphosis and come out a psychic medium.  From an atheist to a sort of believer with a friend in Jeshua.

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